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Pet Sins July 2000

African American man under fire for dating Asian woman

I am a 21 year old African-American male; my dad is a mixture of African-American, white, and Native-American. While growing up I had a lot of black friends, but then my family moved to another part of town and as a result of this I had to change schools. At my new school most of the students were Asian and because I was new I did not have any friends. During lunchtime I would sit on the bench by myself.

After a few weeks at this new school, a few Asian girls noticed me and came over to introduce themselves. They were very nice, they took me around and introduced me to a few of their friends; before knew it I became very popular with the Asian girls. I also made a few other non-Asian friends at school, but I noticed that Asian guys did not talk to me. At that time I did not really pay much attention to it; I was a kid and did think it was a big deal

A few years later I went to high school and I found myself being attracted to mostly Asian girls. One day I saw this Chinese girl and I remember thinking that she was very attractive. I started asking around about that girl and it turned out she was good friends with a friend of mine. I had my friend introduce us and we hit it off right away; we started dating shortly after. I was happy and so was she.

After a few months our relationship got a little rocky. My girlfriend's parents did not approve of her dating a black guy and neither did any of the Asian guys at our school. Many Asian guys started making my life a living hell, they egged my car, spread rumors about me, and I even heard that a group of Asian guys had planned to jump me. My girlfriend and I sat down and had a talk and decided to break up; figuring that it was the best decision for the both of us.

However, my problems did not end there. As time went on I noticed that I was not accepted by a lot of different groups, I did not fit in with a lot of the black guys and the Asian guys just did not like me because of my ethnic background. Sometimes when I went to visit a friend I had to stay outside or wait in the car because their parents did not like blacks and that made me feel like a total outcast.

Even today I feel like an outcast, I like being black, but I have notice that we as a people are discriminated against or just over looked. I have always wondered why Asians do not like blacks? Many of my friends tell me it because of TV. However I don't buy that. As humans we have more in common than not, but it's too bad that people don't want to accept that.

2002