I'm an American woman of European descent. I had a mainland Chinese ex-friend. Once she was going to a Chinese party. She told me I could come if I wanted to but her friends wouldn't feel comfortable with a white person present. Of course I didn't want to go when I heard that. I was upset that she would say something like that.
Over time, I realized she was just using me when she was lonely and new to this city. When she met a group of Chinese she basically dumped me. I did so much for her when she was in trouble and she didn't appreciate it.